on tv

Tomorrow night's film offering: Ice-T stars in "AIR RAGE"

You know, I hate it when a pilot cuts me off and I have to follow him his entire flight plan and wait to land before I can start some shit. 'Cause flipping the bird just doesn't do it in the sky.

SODIE POP SODIE POP

I hear to call of the caffeine sirens,
Compelling me to traipse to the cafe.
The bubbling sweetness may be false in nature
But there is nothing fake about my addiction.
Breathless and still, I hold my cup
To catch the life-giving liquid.

I fill the cup carefully,
Allowing surface tension to hold in even just a couple sips more.

The weirdest stuff turns up on cable

So, right now, 5:20 a.m. on Saturday, "Critters 2: The Main Course" is showing. On TNT.

I guess they really DO know drama.

Healthy eating! (unless you get poisoned, that is)

Dave and I are trying, yet again, to eat foods that are better for us than the fast food, fat-laden dishes to wish our bodies and minds have unfortunately become accustomed.
So we're trying to cook more often and center dishes on veggies rather than meat. And when we do eat meat, it's usually chicken or shrimp.
I do most of the cooking (I don't know if it's because I'm the woman, or because I can actually do it, but there you go ...).
Dave realizes that this puts an unfair amount of pressure on me, so he tries to pitch in.
A couple nights ago, for example, he came home from work as I was preparing dinner and immediately pitched in, dicing onions, scrubbing potatoes and defrosting our precooked, frozen shrimp (we love it. It costs more than buying raw shrimp, but it is 100 percent easier).
But sometimes, he bites off more than he can chew.
Last night, we had the idea to make CLTs -- chicken breast, lettuce and tomato sandwiches.
And he decided he wanted to tackle this dish on his own because I'd been doing all the cooking.
So he brought me the first dish, the chicken breast steaming hot from the pan, the lettuce still crisp, the tomato slices juicy and proudly asked me to try it.
So I took a huge bite into this wonderful sandwich he had made me and had so lovingly presented.
A huge bite right into a section of raw chicken.
And he was upset but understood: It's the thought that counts, but only if it doesn't end up poisoning you.

Second day of class

So, today was better. At least, I feel more confident!
It'll help, I think, if I don't look at other people's stuff.
That's what a friend at work suggested, at any rate.
He said, in fact, "Don't focus on other people. Just give them compliments. But it's not a competition."
He said to remain focused on the work, and it'd get better, and that by the end of class, I'd see.
Then he added, "You can make nice, pretty pictures if you want them to sell at Wal-Mart. Or you can express yourself if you want to stand out."
"Art isn't all about a pretty picture."
He is a genius, my own personal sage.
Now I really feel like no matter what I do, it's going to be OK.
I love the sense of freedom it gives me!
Even if the airplane outline I did tonight is not the best ever, it IS the best I could do.
It's a nice reminder that as long as I'm doing the best I can in everything I try, that's great. Sometimes, my best will be better than what someone else has done. Sometimes, my best won't be as good as someone else's best.
The victory is in the personal best!

Bad haircut

So, the bad haircut I got about a month ago is starting to grow out, and I don't know if it's a good thing or a bad thing.
Good: It's growing out, so my scalp has forgiven me for the massive transgression I visited upon it.
Bad: It LOOKS like it's growing out. So it looks like ass.
Good: The curls are floppy, which works with the haircut to make me look like I spend a lot more time on my hair than I actually do.
Bad: The curls are long enough now to tickle my cheeks, and because my hair is extremely fine and my skin can be sensitive, it's driving me MAD and I spend too much time scratching my face, trying not to scratch my face, or trying to keep my hair out of my face so I don't have to scratch it.
Good: Longer hair will cover the gray!
Bad: I still have gray hairs!

Blasts from the past

The man who played the best friend on "The Wonder Years" is now a lawyer.

And Danica McKellar has a math theorem named after her.

So apparently Fred Savage was really holding them back.

Blarg!

Things I need:
* To get more sleep.
* To get to sleep earlier.
* To be able to wake up promptly with my alarm.
* To not heed my cats' mewling "we're SO lost and NO ONE cares enough to come find us!" cries at 2 a.m.

Drawing class begins

So, I'm taking a drawing class at RCC with Susan and Jeff.
I feel like a dork, and not just because I'm going to have to be showing up, like, 40 minutes after class has already started.
Our first in-class assignment was to draw an abstract (a picture out of focus and upside down), then draw the same picture in focus and right-side up.
To put it kindly, they look about like my work did the last time I took a drawing class -- in seventh grade.
It's just embarrassing. I can take a picture, I can write, I can sew, but danged if drawing isn't just one of the most difficult things ever.
The whole showing up late thing adds to my drama. The class overlaps with work and I can see their point: Leaving early would be a huge distraction. So I asked the teacher if I could just show up late, and he was game, to a point. He warned me I'd be missing a huge part of class -- the public humiliation portion (no, really, the evaluation period) at the start of class. But as long as I'm there every day and don't be all distracting when I come in, he'll agree to let me take the class.
It's pretty intimidating. Some of these people, based on the initial works, should NOT be in a beginning drawing class.
I'd rather be surrounded by people who've just graduated from fingerpainting than people whose first-day, 10-minute drawings could fetch real cash money.
(Funny haha P.S. At first I typed "monet" -- I'm such a dork!)

Fictional characters I'd like to meet

Joe Pike: Robert Crais character. He's a veteran who works with Elvis Cole. He's quasi-antisocial, but has a keen understanding of right vs. wrong vs. the ends justify the means. Like, it might freak me out to actually meet him, cause he's probably pretty intense. On the other hand, I think he'd be really good at giving people some perspective on what's really important. Also, the tats on his shoulders would encourage people to remember to keep moving forward.
Fletch: Gregory McDonald character. NOT the Chevy Chase creation, though that's funny. The novels are darker and more layered. The impression I always got is that IM Fletcher is a hard worker, curious and patient. Bright and sometimes compassionate. I'd like to get his opinion on the Internet age. Where's the place of the investigative reporter in a time when information and news stream 25 hours a day? I think he'd still be a supporter of the printed word. Some stories just don't translate to video.
More to come ...

Too funny NOT to share

NBC and its sister studio have struck a deal to make both Spanish- and English-language versions of a controversial Colombian telenovela whose title translates to "Without Breasts There Is No Paradise."

Haircat

I gave Watson a haircut last night.

He grooms himself - I mean, we SEE him grooming himself - but the hair on his chest was matted, like under his chin, on his chest, where he can't really get to it anymore, and his lower back was just sort of greasy.

I know cats have natural oils and all that, but this was just this side of getting stuff stuck in it ...

He purred the whole time, then got twitchy.

So I put down treat food and they both ignored it. Blarg. When it's too hot for cats to enjoy treats, that's too blarging hot.

And then when I had this pile of extra kitty fur, he started sniffing it.

I could only imagine the philsophical Sartre battle waging in his feline brain: "I'm over there, but I'm here. That smells and looks like me, but I am over here. She's taking from me and adding to that. I've achieved enlightenment: I AM in two places at once."

Home and hope

I spent a good portion of the night making myself feel better by looking at rents in New York City. They're, like, twice as high for half the space. I mean, sure, we're in the IE and not the Big Apple, but that made me feel a little bit better.
I haven't been to New York in my adult life (I think we drove through it on our way to visit one of my mom's college friends when I was a kid), but I like to think our spot of California has more nature in it than most parts of New York City. (New Yorkers, give me a break ... I'm trying to look on the bright side of things.)
When I lived in Springfield, I knew a guy who'd moved there from Chicago and nowhere in the world he'd been, including Springfield, compared to it, and he talked about it All The Time. Every time he found anything about Chicago, he'd send it to us, including an essay that included the poignant phrase, "It's not like there's anything WRONG with your city, it's just not Chicago."
We always good-naturedly raised our eyebrows at his hometown pride. After all, if Chicago's that great, why did he move to Springfield?
Now, I think I can appreciate his feelings.
I loved Kansas. I loved Missouri. But I kept thinking there was something more out there, something better. That's why the California job came at such a wonderful time.
And I wouldn't trade my California experience for anything. After all, this is where I met my husband (a displaced Midwesterner). This is where I've taken some really great pictures, played around at bodyboarding, and made some really great friends (100 percent of them displaced Midwesterners). Heck, I'm only an hour from the beach!
But I miss home.
I miss the clear skies, the clean air, the honest friendliness, the good traffic, the low rent and the weather.
I miss parking easily.
I miss my family, my friends and knowing that no matter where I live, they're probably only going to be an hour away.
I miss knowing where I am, physically and mentally.
It's not like there's anything drastically WRONG with Southern California.
It's just not Kansas.

Britney's mom is just making it worse

Lynne Spears says her daughter Britney, whose public meltdown included
shearing off her own locks, is "just figuring things out."

"It's sad that the whole world had to watch her make mistakes that all of us have made at one time or another," Spears is quoted as telling Us Weekly magazine in its latest issue.

Yeah, 'cause I remember the last time I shaved my head, talked about how my second baby was an accident, went to rehab and married a man whose baby mama was pregnant with their second kid.

So obvious, my need for anti-anxiety meds

Called Target pharmacy after realizing I'd been off meds for A WEEK AND A HALF and STILL NO ONE HAD CALLED ME.

Pharm girl: "Well, it's here and filled."

Me: "WHY DID NO ONE CALL ME TO LET ME KNOW MY ANTI-ANXIETY MEDS WERE IN?!"

Pharm girl: "Well, we usually only do that for prescriptions that are renewed monthly."

Me: "So, no one thought it was necessary to call me - even though they said they would - about my ANTI-ANXIETY medication, even when there had been all this trouble, and even though it's ANTI-ANXIETY medication? So, if I hadn't called today, I would never know that my ANTI-ANXIETY medication was in? Can you tell why I need ANTI-ANXIETY medication?!"

Pharm girl: "Uh ... OK, so I'm going to put a note in here that says, call you any time there's any medication in for you."

Me: "Thank you for understanding. I wouldn't be so upset if it weren't about a pill that helps me keep my brain straight."

Pharm girl: "Yes. I understand."

How was Monday terrible ... let me count the ways

1) Spent $600 fixing a car that we'd just spent $800 to fix.
2) Was tired all day, even though I got, like, nine hours of sleep.
3) Spent $75 on groceries, but then didn't have the energy to cook dinner!!!
4) Got into a misunderstanding with a co-worker, an uber-sucky way to start the week.


OK, spinning it around, for mental health's sake:
1) They think they have it fixed for real this time.
2) I made it through the day just fine and am just an hour or so away from going to sleep!
3) Hey! We actually have groceries!!
4) The co-worker and I debriefed and all is well.

Greetings!

Happy Wednesday!!!
Otherwise known as Happy Only-Two-More-Days-Until-Friday Day.

Which isn't as good as Happy Only-Two-More-Days-Until-Payday.


But will do in a pinch.

Top wishes as of today

1) I want to make enough money to afford a house.
2) I want to reduce my pessimistic attitude.
3) I want to stop seeing duplicity behind every face.
4) I want to find ways to be a better person.
5) I want to eat healthier foods.
6) I want to be successful at something that makes me happy.
7) I want to be respected and not just the person to whom people give their work.
7) I want to be happy.

What is it about weekends?

We had all these Big Plans for this weekend.
We were supposed to clean, then we were going to see "POTC: AWE," then we were going to go the Disneyland.
Thus far, I've mailed packages home and rearranged my sewing area (part of the cleaning to-do list), and that's all.
I wish I could even work up the energy to get irked at myself for my lack of motivation, but this has been the most restful weekend I've had in months!

Crafts, crafts and more crafts

So, I spent part of my Saturday rearranging my little crafts area. It's hard to find room for creating and for the materials to create in a one-bedroom apartment filled with two people, two cats, too many books, and lots of various doodads and whatnots.
But Dave is patient and tolerant of my stuff being strewn all this way and that, so it all works out for the best.
I even try Googling the best ways to set up a sewing area, and get jealous when I see all these people whose rooms -- yes, ROOMS -- have plenty of storage space and abundant ambient light!
The little desk lamp I bought for my table is plenty bright, but TOO bright. If I glance at it accidentally, I get spots! The problem, I think, is that the lampshade is too clear. It's translucent rather than opaque, and it just doesn't shade enough from the 40-WATT BULB! So I stuck a piece of paper over the lampshade to help with the shading and moved the lamp to the other side side of the sewing machine to try to keep from blinding myself.
And then there's the storage. I'm a sucker for bright fabrics. So remnants, quarter panels (or whatever they're called), regular ol' material on the bolt ... whatever it is, if I like it, I'll tote it home, even if I don't have plans for it. So now I have buckets of fabrics that don't match and that I don't know how to use. I finally hit on the idea of keeping a photo album showing tiny squares of the fabrics I've used. That way, I don't feel like I have to keep the whole piece and I can actually use it!
Such is my addiction to this new hobby that whenever I say I went to JoAnn's, Dave just automatically asks, "So, what did you buy this time?"

I just wish I had more ideas for projects for the quarter panels!

Rent is poopy

Just found out they're raising our rent more than $100 a month.
Poop!
It's better than the $400 a month more if we don't sign a new lease, but still ... POOP!

I can't believe how ridiculous rent is in SoCal. It's depressing. I don't know how people live here. Like, I simply can't comprehend.

I try to do the math and I can't.

Poop.